Yasser's Yells

Let me begin by saying that I am still not entirely sure why we have an article about Yasser's Yells in this report. Dr. Hanson assured me that one was necessary, however, and since this is in fact the Butterfly Effect Advisory Committee, there is truly no telling what information might turn out to be important in the future.

Allow me some minor pontification, if you would, while we're on that point. The function of a Butterfly Effect Advisory Committee is to guard against so-called "dark horse" outcomes—that is, outcomes not seriously considered when preparing for the future. If a body, like our own august Assembly, fails to consider a 1% chance of catastrophic failure, then should that slim thread of possibility come to pass, it will do so without any safeguards. I like to think that the function of this Committee is to remain but a minor footnote in the workings of the Disputatious Assembly of Sovereigns and ensure that nothing ever comes to pass that would cause us to rise into prominence. Ours is vital work.

With all of that said, I cannot possibly imagine what dark horse global catastrophe might arise from an independently-owned recreational windstriding company on the fringe of the Ulgravian zeppelin fleet. Still, as mentioned above, Dr. Hanson told me she knows the owner and thinks it's a necessary addition to this report. A good Chairman trusts in the ability of those under his wing, of course, and so I set out to do my due diligence.

After doing my research, I must conclude that it seems like there could very well be something going on with Yasser's Yells. For example, I heard Secretary recommend it while she was standing in our break room. Why, one wonders, would the Secretary of the Disputatious Assembly of Sovereigns know of a small company in a nation she's only visited twice? Suspicious alignments of that sort always suggest a likely candidate, but when I reached out through the usual channels I couldn't find any evidence of botanical business dealings whatsoever. My next thought was that the Botherhood might be involved—which hypothesis is the most probable to my mind, given that when the appropriate contacts investigated, they told me that it was as if the Botherhood had never meddled in Yasser's Yells whatsoever!

In the interest of full disclosure, I intend to patronize this establishment after the report ships out. Dr. Hanson's reviews were quite favorable, and there is still some life in these old bones yet!

Addendum: I just talked to my wife, and she forbade me from windstriding. Alas!

I, too, recommend Yasser's Yells. Hanson introduced me to the owner himself, and he was very professional and helpful. I look forward to trying windstriding at his august establishment immediately after the Butterfly Effect Advisory Committee completes its report.

How exciting! I look forward to hearing all about it.

By the way, as you plan for your vacation, I do hope that you are making progress on clearing out your desk. It has been two years, Mr. Kain. Strictly speaking, you should have been out of here by late 990. Let me know if there's anything I can do to help speed things along.

Don't worry, Dr. Jones. There won't be a trace of me left by the time I leave.