Concluding Recommendations: Dr. Remilion Christophy

Rather than add to the observed geopolitical consequences of the Disarrangement Act, I would like to contribute a recommendation from the perspective of the field of sociophysics. As you surely know, sociophysicists study the ways in which social realities cause variation in or manifestation of physical realities. The social consequences of carrying out the Disarrangement Act would be indubitably immense, and sociophysics tells us that we should be wary of equally immense physical consequences.

For starters, there's just kind of a lot of weird stuff on Iurezza. The Ideal Geology Committee has already thoroughly informed you as to the dangers of moving Barcuvian land or moving other land to Barcu's present location. If Barcu's peculiarities are defined according to global coordinates, then whatever country ends up there may see something new and horrible arise, if it even lasts that long. But what the IGC didn't consider, and therefore falls to the Butterfly Effect Advisory Committee, is whether Barcu might be in the state it is in because of sociophysical effects deriving from the structure of global society. Of course, records indicate that Barcu has been Barcuvian for much longer than the current geopolitical climate, but this is not the last word on the subject. As my colleague Ms. Rubric mentioned in her article on the Chorus Perpetual, I've proposed a sociophysical explanation of the Hegemony's claims about the Chorus and its relation to the stability of our solar orbit. Even though our orbit may not have depended on on the Chorus before, sociological momentum from the repetition of the claim may make it the case that it does now. I suggest that something similar may have happened to Barcu, which has become, in this global age of ours, a symbol the world over for senselessness and chaos.

Given this, if we move around large groups of people, their sense of direction may become confused, and they may regard Barcu to be located in the wrong direction. Through sociophysical principles, this may result in the direction of their regard becoming Barcuvian. Additionally, moving all of the countries around will undoubtedly cause vast amounts of chaos. Might this not cause people to regard the whole world as having become, in a sense, Barcu? Each of you Sovereigns should consider whether, having avoided your country being moved to Barcu, Barcu might yet move to your country. There are good reasons to think that disarranging the countries of the world will shift or expand Barcu's idiomatic physics to cover much larger swaths of the world, or even entire hemispheres. This would be utterly disastrous.

The most wide-ranging effects are obvious, but there are others you should know about in case you think it would be worth the risk. First, note that hurricanes do not currently form in any region subject to Barcuvian physics. While the Ideal Geology Committee has already noted this as a risk of leaving Barcu's place unfilled by a new landmass, a Barcuvian expansion would almost certainly result in the formation of antihurricanes. I have no idea what an antihurricane would do, but I don't want to find out and neither should you. Second, and I note that the IGC did not consider this in their discussion of disarranging Barcu, such areas of open ocean will be subject both to Barcuvian physics and to Grantham's Law. There's no way we could muster enough people to willingly enter Barcuvian oceans just to keep an eye on the aquatic life. The consequences will be unimaginably horrific. If we're lucky, an antihurricane will just be invisible, and countries near Barcuvian oceans will occasionally be destroyed by storms they can't see coming. In the worst case, the antihurricanes could have an inexplicable ability to pick up aquatic life and deposit them inland.

Some Ulgravian agitators in favor of the Disarrangement Act have argued that even if Barcu expands, this will simply give more countries access to free energy. Disregard these charlatans. I have noted the dangers of asynchronous energy previously. It would only exacerbate the issue to widen access to it.

And Barcu is merely the biggest problem on the continent that you don't want to touch. Trying to do almost anything to Iurezza means tampering with forces beyond mortal ken. How do you think the King Eternal is going to take the news that you've moving the Barrowlands? (Do you even have enough interns to get the message across?) All the electric undead are going to end up somewhere after the Disarrangement, and you might find yourself the host. If and when the Disarrangement shifts the borders of Barcu, the location of the Double-North Pole is going to shift too. If this angers Klaus Santanna, you'd better hope Captain Gunnerson finds the Ultimate Dragonopolis soon. If Santanna instead chooses to relocate Bipolaris to wherever the new Pole ends up, God help anybody in its path.

Now, to touch briefly on geopolitics, I must recognize that there is significant dispute going on in the Disputatious Assembly over the Disarrangement Act, and much of it concerns Flandre. Many of Flandre's opponents in the Assembly — most notably the originator of the Act, the Hegemony of Whales — want a Disarrangement that severs Flandre from the oil fields that have made it a world power in the wake of the Whale Tariffs. In order to gain support from those outside of the Hegemony's voting bloc, pro-Act diplomats have played up the threat that Flandre poses to the good order and peace of the world. I note one potential consequence of this that might give such partisans pause. As General Kade Gorson once remarked, "Do not fear the ocean, lest it become fearful to you." The wisdom of these words is backed up by sociophysics. If there are widespread rumors that Flandre is a global threat, this may in turn make Flandre even more of a global threat than it was before the rumors. This means the true threat to world peace is actually the pro-Act faction. I trust the sovereigns of the Assembly will vote accordingly.

Finally, if you'll recall my previous discussion of 🔇, it is critically important that the Assembly takes several things about 🔇 into account. First of all,

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Dr. Remilion Christophy